making mistakes is okay!

There is something else that I am learning in the soul restoration class that I am also (and already) learning/learned in therapy!!!!

It has been interesting how the soul restoration class is reinforcing the things Kristopher has been teaching me.

So I remember when I first started seeing Kristopher and we were talking about one of my children and he was like "It is okay to make mistakes!"

And I was like "Wha......????"

What the what. I don't think so. Not that I am aware of. 

Mistakes are to be avoided. Mistakes are BAD!!!! Bad Bad Bad. Right? Don't make mistakes and try not to let your kids make ANY.

Right? Apparently not. But I think I might have been living my whole life like that.

That mistakes are the worst.

Apparently they are not!

Apparently they are unavoidable and our whole entire life we will be making mistakes and that is just the way it is and it is okay to accept that and be gentle to ourselves over it.

So one of the things that has happened to me in therapy is that outside of therapy I have started to feel Kristopher's voice and I use it in my head at times.

So an example of this is...the other day I mailed a package and work "ground" instead of 3 day air like I was suppose to. I was sad and mad for the screw up and I wanted to beat myself up over it. But then I thought...If I was sitting in Kristopher's office and I told him about this mistake he's be like

"and?"

or he might laugh and be like "yep, mistakes happen."

or "it's okay, don't be so hard on yourself"

Some things like that. So when I go in my mind and feel what he would have said to me I can say it to myself better and be like "Yep, I made a mistake" And I am human and it is okay. 

And that is actually one of the things therapy can do for you if you have the right experience in therapy. I have read about other people having the same thing happen in therapy. They allowed the encouraging and rational voice of their therapist's to replace their inner discouraging and irrational voice.

Can I say that Kristopher may not be for everyone? I have recommended him to friends and they didn't have the same experience as me. That doesn't make them bad or wrong. Or him bad or wrong. It just means it wasn't right for them. There are other therapist so just keep trying if you need help.

This week in the Soul Restoration class it is about having a weak self and a strong self. Maybe consider taking her class. Her name is Melody. I am pretty impressed with how right on target she is. Soul Restoration.

So because I don't want to give away all the secret parts of her class the main point is this...

YES! I have a weak side and a strong side. And that is okay. My weak side is okay! My strong side is okay. 

And they both work together and you can't get rid of either.

And it is okay and normal to have a weak side and every one does THEIR WHOLE LIFE THROUGH.

You can't get rid of your weak side. 

You work to improve her. But that happens throughout your whole life. It doesn't happen over night and it doesn't just happen. So don't feel bad if you have a weak side and that side has weaknesses.

And the quicker you strong side learns to love and help your weak side and quit BULLYING her for messing up, the healthier and happier you will be.