Well, the "ugly cry face" my dad warns me about made it's freak appearance today at a meeting for Bo at his preschool. The teacher, aid, and the lady in charge of the developmental program were all there. Unfortunately the meeting already started off on a bad note as I had forgotten to go and had to be called to come in! I HATE that. My true self has never forgotten a meeting! This zombie mother of six, crazy, active, ADD riddled, children, forgets everything! Who have I become? The old me is one ultra organized chickadee, but this zombie me, is pure ciaos! And I hate it when people don't believe me. I tell everyone, "this isn't me, I'm usually beautifully organized. Six kids one husband, a bazillion pets, have taken over my life!" And they look at me. They smile and nod with fake sympathy. And... they don't believe me. I can tell it is true. They think they could handle it better. I know this because I use to think this when I saw others in the ciaos of large familyhood. If they were just more on the ball they'd be fine, I'd think. NOT TRUE. Unless you are my beloved Mrs. Duggar, you would be in ciaos too! Anyway, back to "ugly cry face." There are some people in this world who just should not be crying in public. Sadly, I am one of those people. It is just not a great look for me. It is very unfortunate because I happen to cry a lot, and at the stupidest moments, in front of everyone, exhibiting "ugly cry face" for the world to see. I HATE it. So the meeting started with casual chit chat and I was literally and truly about to say "I think Bo is just coming along so well!" When the lady in charge says, "I think Bo is not improving at all." WHAT? Break my heart. So I am telling myself, they don't know everything. I see him. He is improving. And he is. But he is not improving in the area of... let see... not shoving your class mate friend on the ground for no reason, or..... not tackling your class mate friend for no reason, or...... not stealing toys and then beating up your class mate for no reason, or.... not overpowering anyone who crosses your way, with your skinny little self, for no reason. Those areas apparently are not coming along so well. Also he is exhibiting extreme defiance. Is that not normal? Oh. I thought it was. So I am starting to feel really bad because he is sounding a bit sociopathish. Shortly after, "ugly cry face" made her dreadful appearance, and I had to cry for a while about my woes. As tissues are being thrown my way, I try to cover "ugly cry face" up but there is just no redeeming yourself from that kind of a scene. ACK! (I saw someone type that the other day. I think it is hysterical) ACK! What is a mom to do! So the solution for now is to switch him to a different preschool class to see if that will help. It is so sad. I just love that "little critter" (his new favorite book) so much that I am apparently clueless to his high level of naughtiness. Look how nice he can be? He is hugging our dog. He eats a bite, hugs the dog, eats a bite, hugs the dog.
Actually the sad fact is, I thing he is a product of his environment. Around this house, with three boys and one rowdy dad, it is ALWAYS wrestle time. It is not uncommon to see Corey beam a ball (just a Nerf) at the boys head just for fun. The boys love it. So Bo probably just can't help it.
On a happier note, I also got a call from the school's acting principal about Nathan. This school is very strict (I adore that) so it is not unusual (okay, not unusual for me) to get a call occasionally. Apparently, Nathan and a buddy were walking down the hall when his little brother, Rhett, was walking down the hall in the other direction. What is an older brother to do but bop his younger brother on the head as he is walking by. It is a law of nature right? And what is a buddy of an older brother to do but... the same. So two bops on the head and one crying 2ND grader later, I received the call. Nathan had to miss recess and gym and apologize and write notes to Rhett. ACK!
So, thus another day in my crazy world.
Isn't this the cutest picture ever? It is more than a few years old but don't those look like the too sweetest brothers in the world? Hopefully a few bops on the head won't damage their brotherly love.
3 comments:
I believe you. I know you are an amazing woman. You are organized. I believe you. I know it is true, because I also have been in a world of complete and utter chaos. That is right. Me, too.
Stop comparing yourself to Mrs. Duggar. It took only two episodes for me, and then never again. Too destructive to my own self worth, ha ha! I do admire her, though. But don't compare yourself to her, still the same.
As for your crazy mixed up world, you are the mom for a reason. And although my world of intensity was for other reasons,I still understand your ugly cry face, chaos, zombie mom, not the real me mom comments. :) The Lord is qualifying you to be somebody He wants you to be. That takes living what we each have to live in this life. It is our spiritual muscles workout plan. ha ha
Earth is just a classroom. A great big one. Sometimes we forget that. I do all the time, so I have to remind myself. Like now, he hee. I love how Sister Satterfield comforted me once by saying how her goal is basically to get through this life with a smile, and that we don't have to be perfect here. We are just here to prove our metal. Show what we are made of. You Susan, are made of steel. Love you. <3
Susan, your "ugly cry face" is the reason I heart you sooo very much. Not the face itself, but the person behind it. You feel so much for everything you do. You give everything your all, so remember that next time you feel you are not doing anything well. It's just because you put the bar sooo high. It's ok to lower sometimes. You are an amazing woman, mother and wife. Don't you EVER forget that.....Tell yourself that everyday when you look in the mirror.
Reading those last two comments, you have the best friends in the world! (I already knew that, heehee!) And the teachers only do see so much. And saying he's not improving at all was harsh, and almost seemed designed to make a mom cry! At the very least it was thoughtless. And the younger kids in the family don't get the "clean slate" of parenting that the older kids do. I see my younger kids doing and saying things their older sibs wouldn't have dreamed of because they are so much influenced by those older kids. And stop comparing yourself to anyone, let alone someone who's life is going to be recorded and analyzed for the world to see. Another child we know seemed destined for a life of sociopathy (if you will, not really!) and she's a lovely young woman now, just a few short years later.
Maybe it's been a hard weekend for parenting, I've about had it myself! Hang in there!
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