Bo gets baptized!

I like the tarantula. He takes no care. He is easy.

I saw this on Face Book. It cracked me up. I think my friend had made a joke about being careful what desserts you eat.

The puppy stinks! Mostly because I refuse to just leave him outside. So we are officially trying to crate train him. But in order to do that I also have to train all the kids on how to train him. So we made a schedule. It's like we've brought home a toddler.

Here is his schedule...

Sorry to write "pee" so much. Google said to call it that for an easy command.

What a headache!

And here he is crated at night. Kate felt sorry for him and this is how we found her later. All sleeping by Mr. Whiny Head. So sweet.

So today in church I was reviewing some notes I took from an addiction class. It was given by a lady who had several sons addicted to drugs. She was so wonderful. She taught me so much. 

I wanted to share a few things. Just because I loved them. Because I want to remember them. Because I want to reinforce them in my own life. 

She said how we let our kids know how we feel about THEM (they personalize it) when we roll our eyes at them or deep breath at them or say my favorite "whatever". It pours "salt in the cracks of our children's hearts". "And sarcasm tear their flesh."

She said "feelings aren't facts. But they are TRUTH for the person who feels them."

I can testify to that. Kristopher has spent a lot of his time with me reminding me to FEEL less and THINK more.

So knowing how long it has taken me to GET that concept I think we have to understand that our kid's feelings are everything to them and very real.

And that is is super important to MIRROR their feelings. From my understanding, you mirror their feelings by giving them empathy, not worrying about who is right or wrong, and saying to them "So what I hear you saying is....", and asking them how they felt about something. And then not telling them their feelings are wrong.

That is what Kristopher has been doing for me. And it has been life altering.

Wikipedia says...Within the area of self-psychology, being mirrored refers "to all the transactions characterizing the mother–child relationship, including not only the reflections of grandiosity, but also constancy, nurturance, a general empathy and respect". The parents' mirroring responses influence the development and maintenance of self-esteem and self-assertive ambitions. Their response will mirror back to the child a sense of worth, which in turn creates an internal self-respect.

The lady said that it is important to mirror our children's feelings because if they don't get their feelings mirrored then they learn it is not okay to feel their feelings. 

And mirroring our children's feelings is part of what "mourning with those who mourn" is all about.

I also liked how she said that when Heavenly Father teaches us we've done wrong we will never feel shame. So I think if that is true then we mustn't shame our children either.

Anyway, just some food for thought. Take it or leave it.

So...yesterday was Bo's baptism day. In the LDS religion we baptize at the age of 8. Because that is when a child is old enough to be accountable for their actions. 

So it was Bo's special day. We woke up to him running away barefoot on his bike. He was NOT GOING TO GET BAPTIZED he said. He also ran away and hid behind the horse trailer when we were all trying to take pictures. It was comical and crazy.

He was just scared. I should have prepared him better and taken him to watch some other kids get baptized. But...I didn't. I also didn't do some of the things I did for the other kids (eight days till baptism, heart attack room). I seriously am still doing them. He will never know if it was before or after and I just can't give it up. I write this to say..... it doesn't have to be perfect. It is okay to improvise. Yay. 

So I told Bo that he didn't have to get baptized (THE LAST THING I WAS GOING TO DO WAS FORCE HIM) but he had to come and at least check it out. So we did. 

And then he went and got baptized like a CHAMP. He didn't even say one more word about it.He went down into the font so quickly I almost missed it. 

Wanna see a lot of pictures? I know you do!

Corey and Bo discussing baptismal protocol.

I think these pictures are so cute. Daddy tying Bo's shoes

My boy. This little guy is the sweetest boy ever. I'm so glad his medicine is working so well and others get to see what I have ALWAYS known about him. Very grateful.

Brody trying to get through from under the fence. Ha Ha

Then we had a sweet little meeting where they spotlighted each kid. Bo stood on a little step stool in front of everyone so cute as they read the little things I wrote about him.

Going to get baptized...

They go into a font (which is like a big tub) and we watch and that is that!

After the baptism we had a little testimony (mine) and then he was confirmed.

We have a great little church community. I am very grateful for the people involved in Bo's life.

This is one of the kindest and gentlest men around.

Getting a treat from my friend and the representative of the primary.

Aunt Sheri and Uncle Frank. They are so great to come to all of the activities and give us such support. Love you guys!

SERIOUSLY...CUTE BOY, RIGHT?

Grandma and Grandpa bought him this new outfit for his baptism day.

His sweet church teacher Kristy. She has gone above and beyond for Bo. She soothed me when I was in mental chaos over him. She really held it together for both of us for a good year during church.

Kate just loves him so so much. Its sad and sweet. See his face?? Ha Ha.

 Taller then Grandpa finally! Success!

Afterwards we had a nice little picnic...

Grandma writing him a love note for his scrapbook.

Grandpa Dale and his love letter

More later! (not much though, I promise :) )